"my resolve is weakening"

In my opinion, it all started on Friday with the patio chair at Liz's house: I went to sit down, and the seat of the chair collapsed completely - not the frame of the chair, just the seat. I told Adam if I went early with this baby it would be because of the chair. On Sunday my contractions were kind of close but who wants to keep track? I wanted to get things ready just in case, so I packed my hospital bag, packed a bag for Lily, cleaned the kitchen and started the laundry. We went to church, whereupon I sat in Relief Society timing my contractions (it's easy when there's a clock right there), which were about 5-7 minutes apart. I didn't think that was too close, but I was really sweaty and hot and started looking around wondering if it was just me. We went home and I finished up with tidying the house: I still didn't completely believe I was in labor, but then my contractions started being super intense, and I said "whatever, let's go to the hospital." So we checked in about 3:30 p.m., and after 30 minutes with an inexperienced CNA who was more concerned about getting my blood pressure than getting a nurse to check me so if I was in labor I could start the IV with the antibiotics for strep B, and also condescendingly letting me know that they needed to monitor the fetus so I should 'slip' this teensy tiny elastic band over my stomach that made it impossible to breathe through contractions no matter how painful it was; FINALLY, after 30 minutes, a nurse came in and checked me and said I was dilated to 8 cm. By this point I couldn't relax, and that's when the pain really started coming, and I would look pleadingly at Adam and say "my resolve is weakening, can't I have any pain medication?" It seemed like I repeated this a few times, but each time he just kind of chuckled and said I was doing a really good job and he was very proud of me. I also remember repeatedly asking "how far away is he?" "what is the longest period of time before he's born?" "am I past transition?" So unfortunately, if anyone was passing by my room and knew I went natural, I'm afraid to say I didn't do Hypnobirthing justice. But oh well. It's over and this moment was so worth it all.